Well...
I come to this blog every once in a while... Feeling guilty for not updating. Really WANTING to... but just not into updating EVERYTHING from 2011...
Wow...
But I come here tonight just to type. It has nothing to do with our family happenings, or parties, or holidays, or funny kid moments...
I'm here to let it out.
I. Feel. Like. Poo.
That's right... Poo... I guess its not a very strong word, but it's all I can think of right now.
I having one of those times where the adversary really got a grip on me and has made me feel like I am nothing. Like I suck as a mother. I'm too tired to do anything fun anymore. What happened to that mommy who used to plan a fun activity for the week and a craft, story, etc to go with it... She's definitely not here. I feel like I suck as a friend. And a wife. My house is a disaster. My body doesn't feel right. And the rest of it... well... that's where the Poo comes in. I just don't feel good... I want to run out the door screaming and crying.
This is NOT a "pitty party post". It's not a post where I'm searching for comments... in fact it's quite the opposite. I don't want to really talk to anybody and be a downer in somebody's life. I guess that's why I turned here. I don't really have to "talk" and be a burden... and I can just pretend that nobody reads this... right?
I know everyone has these days... weeks... whatever. It's normal I guess. I just have to keep remembering that it is... and that for where I am in my life right now and with certain things that are happening... this is sort of expected I guess...
It will get better. I won't feel like this forever. Just have to remember to be happy... :)
On a different note, my amazing visiting teacher just "stopped by" tonight with dinner. Because she was that in tune. How awesome is that? No reason. Just because. I really am surrounded by amazing people and friends and family. I have a good life. And I'm thankful...
I'm just ready for the "poo" feeling to be gone...
In due time I guess... :)
over and out...
